Semen’s antidepressant, rejuvenating qualities


Semen’s antidepressant, rejuvenating qualities

CELESTE THERON is all the wiser after reading a crash course in creative love play. She has learned that the scrotum is kind of sacred and about fertile face masks.


ON the shady side of a Christmas party on a rooftop in Pretoria, I hide behind sunglasses. Fancy free and divorced, trying to avoid the scorching heat and the growing crowd. Deborah Steinmair steps forward from a long table and approaches me with a request to write a book review. No one else wanted to tackle it, she warns me with a slight smile, and burdens me with Sex Tips for Creative Lovers: Pleasure for Everybody by Jüne Plã. Suddenly, the intrusive gaze on the bustling roof feels too much and I disappear to the nearest shady spot. I lie down on my back in the garden and light a cigarette: this is my call to adventure.

The book is striking, with lovely line drawings showcasing the body in all its glory. Who is Jüne Plã, I want to know? I I open the book at “anal douche" and decide to scroll on. Plã is first and foremost a French artist and comics illustrator working in the world of gaming. She is the founder of Bliss Club, an Instagram-based feminist platform which preaches the gospel of wholehearted sexual exploration, regardless of your orientation. Sex Tips for Creative Lovers is an offshoot of this platform that strives to create a cohesive voice for sex without shame. The full extent of sex in all its facets should be obtainable for every soul — with or without a dick — Plã believes.

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Handy refresher

As a free woman with a deep interest in the erotic and spiritual nature of the Indian Tantra, I was surprised. When I innocently opened the book at “fisting", I realised I might not be as creative as the title suggests and immediately decided to investigate fully. The sex in the text has been thoroughly analysed and this is my finding: a clit guide to Christmas is a handy refresher, even for those familiar with What Girls Need to Know or those who don't identify as little ladies. This is for everyone, and I don't have to sell it because sex is mostly free or sells itself.

Plã is not a sexologist or psychologist but might be described as a Samaritan with a driving need to approach sex in an inclusive framework. The book is simply laid out with naughty line sketches that playfully complement the text, cheerful butts dancing voluptuously on every page. The language used is inclusive, compassionate and will be understandable even to a child — so hide it well away from your children.

The book starts at the beginning, and those who had biology as a matric subject may already be familiar with the anatomy of the soulful dick or know the difference between the vulva and the vagina. Plã never refers to penis, vulva or vagina, except in the first section addressing the anatomy, preferring genderless terms such as “widget" and “thingamajig". Her relaxed use of language may annoy you slightly but it eases the tension around the subject.

I found the sketches informative and feel my life is enriched now that I know the scrotum is kind of sacred. What I like about Plã's approach to sex is that she doesn't focus on the act but creates an intimate space for a more sensual playground. “Foreplay" is a horrific word; I completely agree. There is such a thing as erotic elegance and that includes your use of language. Please don't ever ask your lover if they've “come". I squirm to think of the bright eyes that fix on you while posing such a muddled question. Orgasms are a tear in the ocean: focus. There are several oceans to overcome and the tempting campaign is worth its weight in gold. Uninhibited sex, of course, depends on consent and kindness, and Plã discusses this thoroughly.

Free face mask

It's refreshing to read a sex guide that doesn't focus on gender and creates space for a broader sexuality without any shame. The book emphasises pleasure but also briefly discusses what to do in the case of sexual harassment, violence or sexually transmitted diseases. In a nutshell, it can be seen as a kind friend who has your best interests at heart. Each tip is accompanied by an illustration, which makes it easy to look something up.

What I thoroughly enjoyed are the tips in the exploration map of “widget" and “thingamajig". There are also beauty tips such as a free sperm face mask to prevent ageing, but not all of the tips are as in-your-face. Semen is also a natural antidepressant, who would have guessed? I have to leave something to the imagination, which is why I won't discuss all my favourite tips.

Plã may be a creative but she is indebted to Odile Fillod, a sociologist and independent researcher in biomedical science, Dr Clémentine Courage (yes, she really exists and is a gynaecologist), and Arsène Marquis for their contributions to the book's inclusive use of language. You don't have to be truly creative to benefit from Sex Tips for Creative Lovers, you're only expected to love. Let the spirit guide you through the text.

Who, what, where and how much?

Sex Tips for Creative Lovers: Pleasure for Everybody by Jüne Plã is published by Hardie Grant Books and costs R375 at Exclusive Books.

♦ VWB ♦

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